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On expanding a disagreeable situation into a sandlot rhubarb

Feb 10, 2006 09:36 AM
by Bill Meredith

Hello Bruce,
Welcome to theos-talk. I will try, with the best of intentions, to say some things that I would want someone else to say to me in a similar situation.
robert_b_macd wrote:

In the end, this site is the responsibility of everyone. If we want a
civil site, we can't expect the moderator to babysit us, we have to
stand up for one another.
Or perhaps, we need to learn to stand on our own two feet and give others time and space to learn to stand on their own as well.

< When bad behavior is exhibited, we might
have to hiss a little bit. Don't be afraid to call someone out for
bad behavior, the rest of us will back you up.>

Recognizing bad behavior in others seems easier than recognizing our own bad behavior. Who is "the rest of us?" This choice of words and tone is expected on a children's playground or in a gang-infested neighborhood, but seems somehow out of place here.

The original difference of opinion about whether HPB was being treated as a deity was between Bart and Carlos. Bart's ML quote was something for Carlos to consider and then dismiss or take to heart. It was for Carlos that Bart wrote. Perhaps Carlos wrote to you privately and ask you to "stand up for" him? For whatever reason, in choosing a side and creating a dispute where none existed before, you did not hasten a peaceful resolution, but instead your "bad behavior" made room for expanding a potentially disagreeable situation to include additional issues now solely between you and Bart. That you have a gift for words is undeniable, but perhaps in the future you might restrain your ego long enough two brothers to reach an acceptable solution between themselves? Consider this: two wrongs will not make a right, but together they may make a catastrophe.

This whole situation is making for some strange bedfellows.

As for me, Bart is a friend and it pains me to see him treated this way. Still, I know Bart and when he is wrong he will apologize, not because it has been demanded of him, but because it is the right thing to do. Bruce, I can't say that I know you that well........yet.

Now, hopefully no one will view this post as an attack upon you and feel the overwhelming urge to stand up for you by writing a post attacking me. That would be a further mistake.



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